Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2018 5:58 am
A series of letters, written by many different hands, all leading to the same unknown place.
I hate everyone. I really, really do. Maybe a few exceptions, but the rest? Make me regret ever coming to this gods forsaken rock. How can people so stupid live so long? Likely because all they do is beat each other up all day for fun, at least as far as I can tell. All the people worth talking to tend to hide a lot for that very reason.
I'll share some examples. I saw a man demonstrate proper gun usage by firing straight into the air. In a crowded city. I saw man get his kicks by trying to electrocute children. He ran before I could kill him. No other good (bad) ones come to mind, but with these people's intelligence, it's a miracle we've yet to descend into anarchy. You'll hopefully know soon after that happens.
I don't go outside much anymore, part of me almost laments it, but then I remember why I left. I have Delia and Red, I need little more. And this other woman you apparently sent me. I received them well, but with tensions simmering down, we're considering what to do with her. All else fails, it's a big house. Just don't send me people without any prior notice in the future.
Hoping for the best,
I've returned safely to the mainland, and I'm happy to report my love is well. I hadn't the strength or will to do much more than lament over the whole ordeal whilst home, I'm sure you can understand. It's a miracle I was able to remain clear-headed enough to order what I did. I received her old journal as a gift for my birthday, and suffice to say it was rather enlightening. I learned of the horrible things that had happened when I had left her. I know the terms are likely already clear to you, but I shall not be leaving the mainland anytime soon.
I cannot let that happen again. To anyone. Mostly her. It sickens me to think about it. The Empire's priorities are an enigma, truly. Languishing over their collective incompetence will not make them suddenly improve though. We've finally established a base of operations to better protect her. And everyone else.
She gave me this beautiful amulet. Supposedly it helps ward off illusions. I wear it at all times aside from when I rest regardless of any sort of magical properties it may or may not have. Otherwise it rests on a mount in my room.
My only regret is how we've fallen apart. Perhaps I cannot truly love? I feel as though despite all my efforts, I've failed her. I gave her my word, and I couldn't even live up to that much. When I gaze upon the gifts she has granted me, I feel guilty. Yet at the same time, I feel happy for the memories she left me with. I am deeply conflicted, though there is one thing I take from all of this.
I will love her, forever and always, in my own way. Thank you for granting me the opportunity to meet her, I shan't disappoint you.
I'm not sure what either of us were thinking sending me here, but I can assure you, it's a waste of my talent. Especially having to deal with that snot-nosed brat of a right hand. Why haven't we killed her yet? Please tell me why. I'm begging to know. Oh, wait, I already know the answer. She's just a minor nuisance, white noise in the grand scheme of things. I just like to vent about it. Seriously reconsider who you send here though, please. Relay that one to Daddy for me.
As to what I've been up to? Jack shit and fuck all. I got bored roleplaying and went undercover again. Who knew it'd be so hard to find someone to wear? I gutted a few bandits to keep sharp, and since most people are psychopaths, no one in the desert seemed to give a shit that I was ninety-percent red.
I guess I can share a little of what human interaction I got while pretending to be an innocent girl. I met some crazy bitch real early on who called herself Envy. No one seemed to think much of it at the time, and honestly, she was mostly harmless. I was put on the spot to come up with an alias, so I just went with Taki. Yeah, real original. Well, it's not so obvious if you don't know who I am, so it went fine. As it turns out, she was very much not human, and my rusty shitty dagger I had forgotten in my left boot only put up an okayish fight with her.
We got along okay, and it passed the time. Later on when I finally got my weapons fixed, I beat some spikey haired weirdo up pretty soundly in a tavern I ended up working at a few years later. Tried to get work doing odd jobs with some Redtail and another chick I can't quite place. Somehow they weren't suspicious with my lnet label being the result of figuratively smashing my head into the interface. Word of advice, tell any other scouts to avoid their devices like the plague. I always bury mine when I get to business, or shove it some place I know is safe enough. Can't confirm it, but the bastards probably spy on everyone.
One last note, back to who you send here. We need more eyes. Relay the message to my new pet, since the last one got kidnapped.
Things are going super spectacular! Is what I wish I could open this letter with, but my gun seems like a better fit for my mouth by the day. The last thing I'd hear: 'Meow'. Poetic, truly. Seriously though, this post is maddening. Is this some kind of divine punishment? Maybe, since I'm trying to find any sort of pattern in the ever shifting nature of the Hanging Star. My dearest black kitty is the only thing that keeps me sane these days, and that's saying something. Though to be fair, most people don't love her the way I do. Or at all. In fact, I'm pretty sure the other ninety-nine percent of her acquaintances want to kill her.
At least she's good with dodging heat, or I'd have to spank her in the unfun way. I'd be stressing less if all my pseudo-children didn't keep vanishing or getting hurt. Am I just a bad parent? Maybe, but damned if I don't try. They just like running too far, and I have too much work to babysit all of them at once. I have no idea where Kyaos went to, and Nirrti has some really weird friends. Darpan has thankfully avoided getting on the law's bad side for awhile now.
No progress on my research, sadly. A few more decades of this and we may just have to accept Iahsus is a chaotic, unpredictable force. Just don't enlist any Humans into the army, eh? Liabilities. Replace them all with Grimalkin instead. Or conversely, maybe we could focus efforts on subverting the corrupting nature of the ever present star. A bit more complicated than staring into the night sky, but as many men are like to forget, our greatest foe is the Hanging Star, Iahsus.
Instead they all decide to kill and maim each other for whatever reasons they pull out of the jar that week. A vampire breathed my air? A veritable legion descends upon the Empire's major port city, many are wounded and killed, and then everyone goes back to the usual grind. Those darn kids stopping my kidnappings? The Arena is besieged for the nigh thirtieth time, no one is surprised. Some situations I don't end up getting the whole story on, but we get a LOT of renegade misanthropes with homicidal tendencies. I'm starting to see why.
Maybe the Empire will track one of these rogue bio terrorists down after one of their cities is converted into a necropolis? I just hope it's not this one, because I just got out of one and boy am I not looking forward to living in ANOTHER ONE. Hint to Imperial spies: this is not a threat, please do a better job containing these awful things.
Yours with love <3