Harassment

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Revision as of 18:46, 15 June 2023 by Neus (talk | contribs)
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Because this is a serious issue that can pollute the waters of player communication and comfort, this page seeks to define harassment as clearly as possible. It also provides a few methods to avoid falling into scenarios where your actions could be interpreted as harassment.

Where can harassment occur?

We consider reports which are made to us that occur both in-game and out-of-game (via Discord, etc.), even if they take place in private channels.

  • Private channels include things such as Discord DMs, group discussions in private channels or servers, etc. The reason for this is that they are ripe for 'avalanching' or 'echo-chambers'; players who are in these spaces, but unfamiliar with a victim will inevitably have biases against them when repeatedly exposed to an aggressor's negative portrayal of them, even if they have never met the player in question.
Example:

Risu and Air are friends. Risu dislikes Maria, while Air has not spoken to them. Risu repeatedly tells Air that Maria is a bad roleplayer and should be avoided.
Risu is harassing Maria by slandering them. Because Air and Risu are friends, Air may feel inclined to avoid Maria, even though Maria hasn't done anything to Air.
Maria is ostracized from interacting with Air due to Risu's indirect harassment.

What is harassment?

We define harassment as; any sort of targeted, repetitive, unwanted behavior with the goal of intimidating, humiliating, ostracizing, or making the victim uncomfortable.

  • Contacting an individual, either publicly or privately, with the intent to insult, threaten, etc. them is not allowed.
Example:

Risu messages Maria, saying 'You should just quit this game already before I make you miserable.', or 'No one here likes you.' - Risu is harassing Maria by insulting and threatening them.

  • Contacting the victim's friends or peers and attempting to spread misinformation about them with the same intent is not allowed.
Example:

Risu messages Zeo, Maria's friend, and tells him 'Maria is only pretending to be nice to you. She told Air that you were a turbo nerd!' - Maria never said anything like that. Risu is harassing Maria by slandering them.
If Air were to help spread that misinformation, knowing it's a lie, then Air would also be taking part in the harassment.

  • Taking IC action with similar intent is not allowed. For example, entering an RP scene with someone with the intent to annoy, distract, or disrupt them for OOC reasons.
Example:

Risu's character walks into a scene where Maria's character is currently RPing with Zeo's character and having fun. Risu doesn't like that. Risu's character breaks a chair over Zeo's character's head and begins screaming profanities to ruin the scene for her.
Risu is harassing Maria by deliberately derailing and ruining Maria's RP, despite it being done IC.

  • If more than one person is involved in the action(s) mentioned above (such as 'group bullying', or 'group intimidation'), all aggressors will be punished.

Retaliation

When you retaliate against someone who has reported you for harassment (or other issues), you are harassing them.

  • Retaliation means any sort of aggressive or negative behavior taken by you, or others (at your behest), in response to you being reported, warned, or punished.
Example:

Maria has reported Risu for harassing them. Risu is warned by a GM not to do that.
Risu messages Maria and says 'Solve your own problems you little rat, don't run to your mommy GM and tattle on me.'
Risu is retaliating against Maria because she's upset that she got reported. It would still be harassment even if Risu were being sarcastic or passive aggressive instead of just rude.

  • This doesn't include things such as blocking someone, or removing them from a private group DM.
  • It does include removing them from in-game Guilds or RP spaces. In the event that you like or need to pursue this sort of action, consult a GM first.
  • In the event you need to speak to someone who reported you because you believe there was a misunderstanding, or because you want to bury the hatchet with them, etc., then do so by asking the person 'is it alright if we speak about this?'. If they say no, do not continue to attempt to discuss the topic, and seek out a GM instead.

What isn't harassment?

Not all confrontations constitute harassment. Harassment involves a level of consistency, malice, and repetition.

  • We recognize that not everyone is going to get along all of the time, and you may feel the need to privately expression your opinions and frustrations to others (either to the source of them, or to friends); this is normal. When it becomes an issue is if it becomes repeated behavior.
Example:

Michelle is in a group DM with a few others, and privately vents; 'I got into an argument with Maria and she was kind of mean about it.'
Risu is in the same group DM and replies as she always does when Maria comes up; 'Yeah, she's like that. It's why no one likes her.'
Michelle isn't harassing Maria. Risu is, because she consistently speaks ill of Maria whenever she's brought up.

  • Brief, one-off verbal clashes are not likely to be interpreted as harassment, even if you got into an argument with the same person once before. If a pattern of such behavior emerges, however, these same clashes may become harassment, even if they weren't before.

How do I make sure I'm not harassing someone?

If you and another player have a thorny relationship and you're worried that disagreements or arguments you have with them could get reported as harassment, here are a few ways to avoid it.

  • If you are going to enter a conversation with someone and you feel it may become heated, ask a GM to sit in to moderate and monitor the discussion. They will do their best to keep anyone from breaking any rules and keep the discussion productive.
  • Be mindful of attitudes and moods, both of yourself and others, when you speak with them. If you feel yourself getting hot-headed and unable to control your temper, or if the other person seems upset or uncomfortable, take a calming breath and ask them if they feel so. Or, cease the conversation and contact a GM.
  • Avoid saying negative things about others, both to them directly and privately to others, even if you believe them to be true. Doubly so if prompted only by the mention of someone you dislike!
  • Remaining calm and respectful during disagreements, even with people you dislike, goes a long way. If you feel you can't, then disengage from the conversation, bring it to a GM, and let them handle it.
  • If someone asks you to stop speaking with them, you are expected to do so. If they have blocked you, attempting to message them on an alternate account or via a third party who is not a GM is not advised, as it could be taken as harassment (as it is unwanted and repetitive behavior). Do not continue to discuss the topic; if needed, bring it to a GM and let them handle it.

Disclaimer

Risu and Maria actually get along very well, despite the examples mentioned above. You, too, should always try to get along with every player you meet.