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Journal of Alivia Tate
A small book is carried around by a certain papillion who had only recently left the forest, For the most part, generally hidden in her bag.

Quote:I have recently been released from the prison hospital they put me in when they found me, Supposedly I have been rehabilitated and am able to act on my own now. Or they simply gave up on me. 

With my new found freedom, I have decided to try to pursue the person I used to be. Unfortunately, I have not found out anything about the identity of the person named 'Alivia', but it is the name that was on my uniform, and in turn, decided to take for myself. Whatever medical practices they performed was not on any public records, and no one has shown any look of recognition towards me.

Staying in Karaten will not get me anywhere. 
Quote:I finally managed to make my way to Cellsvich-- I wasn't actually allowed to go in directly from the mages guild without proper registration. And I have fully committed to this name. The adventurers I have observed aren't the most intelligient, and still no true looks of recognition.

I heard there was a hospital. Perhaps I can relearn some of my old skills there. Assuming I even was apart of medical staff at all.

Addendum: Never mind. I need more experience. Thankfully, a Ronin-- I believe their name was 'Shiraishi' has provided me funding for medical schooling. I need to be sure to repay their kindness one day.
Quote:I still get flashes of nightmares when I sleep. And sometimes even being awake feels like a dream. Sometimes I still see them. Serpants who want to strangle the life out of those I care for. In the end I've come to realize they simply want to protect me-- but they are quite indescriminate.

I've been told to try not to acknowledge them. And that my illusions are dangerous. Its better I dont lean on my powers. But I have learned to control my wings somewhat.

Apart from that, my schooling is going quite well. I've contemplated visiting a Therapist again, but I worry it may lead to issues down the line. Probably paranoia. Probably best to just write about my feelings instead. I dont like feeling judged.
Quote:Got a break from school, Decided to visit Dormeho. The ocean is quite abit more beautiful than I originally anticipated.

Visited a place called the Rogue Salamander. Seems pretty shady, but theres a Clinic nearby. Sat at a small table to only realize there was a basket on it already. I ended up eating french fries with a few drunks, and-- may perhaps get a job in the future. Even if its as a student under supervision, I'd be happy for it. But nothing is set in stone yet and no one has been talked to yet.

Maybe I can ask them if they know me. Pretty unlikely though. It feels like Alivia was completely off the radar. And the only places I can think of to look are.. dangerous.

In the meantime, I am taking care of a man named Liam.
Quote:This entry seems to have a drawing of the militia holding Akito up into the air before throwing him up into the air and catching him, He is holding a champions belt. He looks incredibly nervous.

Today was eventful.

There was a man talking about cannibalism in Cellsvich Square. My brain went to terrible places. I know for a fact that it was my brain just trying to trick me. It feels like my other hallucinations but.. worse.

I lost my lunch.

Otherwise, there was a cooking contest today.. It was-- interesting. I won a brooch at an archery game. It was mostly dumb luck..

I saw a man summon what I can only assume is a Youkai to help him cook while he sang some Onigan song that I dont know.

Note to Future Me: Do not voluntarily try spicy food in the future. I cannot handle it.

Then there was the last three participants who made it to the finals-- all of them were filled with quite abit of energy! It actually surprised me. The sampled food was also really good. And it helped me forget the aforementioned incident.

Seemed like a militiaman named Akito won. Was a pretty good decision overall in my opinion. He came in like a scared coward, but left being a rather motivational individual..Atleast until the Militia dogpiled him.

Had some nice conversations at the Rogue Salamander. Met a woman with terrible eyesight. Apparently they see things too? Are they like me?
Should try to find more information if I can. Could not get any specifics.

Some person named Smokes let me rant at them for abit. I feel pretty relieved. Atleast for now.

Curiousity: Why do certain phrases, and appearences, make me feel more nervous?

Note to Future me x2: Look into finding other Papillions. Perhaps they can get my mind set to a better place. Or reaffirm that I am some sort of freak and should try to push this corruption away.

Getting into drawing. Maybe I can use this as a fallback career.
Another journal entry makes its way in, This one accompanied by a cartoony picture of a certain firecracker red-head flopping into bed under a red star while holding an actual firecracker.

Quote:Wake up today, go about my usual schedule, head to the Rogue Salamander to find a felidae bleeding out from a hug from a Shaitan. Okay then.

Follow them to the clinic, hang out for abit to try to give a proper introduction, since the chance at a proper mentor-- or a job, would be nice. Some lady-- Tanael I think their name is, drags a corpse into the clinic. Wrapped up thank goodness. Before leaving.

The cat is fine, I make my introductions, but today seems like a busy day, so I take my leave once that is done.

Head back to the bar, Stop to talk to Liam, Learn that the victim is named Eris. Apparently Momo almost stabbed somone? Whatever. Not my business. But it feels like alot of stuff is happening at once. Im supposed to stay safe as best I can and avoid being caught out alone too much. Makes sense.

Hang around abit, people are mourning, as expected. And overall it feels kinda like a downer day.

Thankfully a couple of good things happened.

I met another Papillion named Tae. And I got her thoughts and advice on a few things.. Managed to learn abit more about how-- our kind, probably works. And have resolved to broaden my horizons on who to speak to for advice to corrupted in general, atleast. Probably even wider-- though I feel like the corrupted are more likely to fully understand. It was pretty nice overall. Had fun hanging with them.

I spoke about my problems from before the cooking contest. And it happened again. I felt sick. But atleast I didn't throw up this time. I brought it on myself for bringing it up.

Talked with Smokes again. Showed her a few pictures I drew. Talked in more detail about how my usual hallucinations work. And the stuff I spoke about earlier. They were interested in seeing my illusions first hand.

I was reluctant at first, but she was also pretty persistant. Eventually I relent and we both head down to the boxing ring.

She seems to get poisoned-- but its nothing seemingly lethal. Atleast, I hope not. Eventually, we both make our way back up to hang out even more. And Im offered a place to stay for the night.

Later, I heard from the snake-guard-lady that another killing happened in the capital. Blonde hair, Muscular, Male. Dunno the name.

...After me and Smokes tested the illusions. I swear I thought I saw her corpse while we were relaxing.. And Im finding Im pretty bad at hiding it when somthing freaks me out.

It feels like my hallucinations are getting worse. I still dont know what to do. Fuck. I can only assume its a side effect of how...weirdly creepy today was.

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