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The Warrick Doll
#1
From popular demand and in honor of my best(?) character, Doctor Warrick.
A brand of Warrick dolls have reached the markets, you pull the string and he says a quote, normally berating you or those around you.


.png   Warrick Toy Template.png (Size: 895 bytes / Downloads: 2,139)

This PNG is made with a blank background, and sized for face icons, attach it to your face icon and have fun, when you pull the cord, roll a d20 and you get the following quotes.


**SAVE THIS**
1. You owe me a lot of money.

2. Not even the power of friendship can fix you.

3. I'm not a teacher, I just act like one and people bought it.

4. You're the living equivelant of a participation award.

5. You're an asshole...you know who you are.

6. You'll get over it tomorrow.

7. Under my professional observation, you're fucked.

8. I'm a doctor first, a person second.

9. Yes, it is all your fault.

10. If I'm a villain, you're a goddamn saint, and we all know that isn't true.

11. Mountainside Academy was an inside job.

12. I would make fun of you, but mother nature did that for me.

13. I was a toy before it was cool.

14. I was a doctor before it was cool.

15. Stop stealing my clothes.

16. You're the son I never wanted.

17. Is that a short joke?

18. Don't touch me, I bite.

19. My tuition is not expensive...

20. I did not say that.
[Image: g5VjMYf.png]
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#2
I was threatened at knifepoint to make a list of 100 quotes, enjoy.

*There is no 77, it is dead silence :V*

Roll a d100 every time you pull the cord

1. You owe me a lot of money.

2. Not even the power of friendship can fix you.

3. I'm not a teacher, I just act like one and people bought it.

4. You're the living equivelant of a participation award.

5. You're an asshole...you know who you are.

6. You'll get over it tomorrow.

7. Under my professional observation, you're fucked.

8. I'm a doctor first, a person second.

9. Yes, it is all your fault.

10. If I'm a villain, you're a goddamn saint, and we all know that isn't true.

11. Mountainside Academy was an inside job.

12. I would make fun of you, but mother nature did that for me.

13. I was a toy before it was cool.

14. I was a doctor before it was cool.

15. Stop stealing my clothes.

16. You're the son I never wanted.

17. Is that a short joke?

18. Don't touch me, I bite.

19. My tuition is not expensive...

20. I did not say that.

21. I am offended by what you said and I refuse to forgive you.

22. I feel like that was an insult.

23. Stop pulling my string.

24. Say that again out loud and recall how stupid you are.

25. OOC: Call me Doctor Doom one more time... (Reroll)

26. My body is destroyed but my funny bone will always stay.

27. I am not nice.

28. If you want to show you love somebody, leave them alone.

29. I don't drink coffee.

30. Kaluex is pretty bad at his job.

31. There's a little bit of me in you, and it's probably trying to vice grip your heart.

32. I'm not sorry.

33. Stop asking me to spar with you.

34. I only became a teacher because people stole my job and made a hospital.

35. Fuck you.

36. Your friend is dead, trust me I'm a professional.

37. Don't take my line of fashion and make it into a cult.

38. The Warrick Rangers should be arrested.

39. Don't shake your fist at somebody, you get a month in prison for that.

40. I've heard enough dramatic backstories to ignore you.

41. Who hasn't broken Monte's legs at some point?

42. I fell down the stairs and died.

43. You did something at some point in some way, and you probably screwed up.

44. Look to the sky, I think I see your desires, no you can't reach them.

45. I refuse to help you.

46. Whatever you want, you don't deserve it.

47. You will cease breathing in 30 seconds.

48. Look at my face and tell me I'm joking.

49. I don't joke, I'm just looking at one.

50. Drink all of the potions you want, it wont cure your stupidity.

51. I killed a serial murderer to protect my students and I got arrested for it.

52. Your life is expiring with each passing second.

53. Rest in peace Krono, you made a terrible bat.

54. You're stuck with me in your head for all eternity now.

55. You may forget about me, but I'm always watching, most likely with a knife in hand.

56. I assure you, what you are thinking right now is probably wrong.

57. I don't fight, but people keep making me.

58. Even if I love you, I still hate you.

59. I don't speak that sushi language of yours.

60. *Speaks a random swear word in Chataran.*

61. I'd slap you, but just washed my hands.

62. Can we skip the part where you spout your terrible past?

63. You should feel sorry for me, I have to put up with you.

64. I get a lot of fan mail, from my one fan.

65. I was going to teach Barra to read, but then my school exploded.

66. I grew up with a loving family, went to school and got a degree, are you crying from my terrible backstory?

67. Am I bothering you, because it's your fault I'm here.

68. How to cure Void Poisoning, pick a god and pray.

69. You're trying too hard.

70. Mercala hates me.

71. Can you believe people praised me for being some genius when all I did was use basic logic?

72. I swear I'm a better detective than the guards.

73. Who said you were in control here?

74. I use the one and only spell I've ever cast in my life, 'Detect Bullshit.'

75. Don't look at me, you're the one who wasted your money.

76. Man you must've bought me for cheap because you can't even pay attention.

78. *Menacing voice* What did I just say...

79. Flip a coin, heads you're an idiot, tails you're not smart.

80. To be fair, I warned you.

81. You know you're asking a piece of plastic right?

82. You have less substance than a stabilizer.

83. Don't call me dad, I have enough kids.

84. Life is difficult, yours is impossible.

85. I don't want you to die. I'll feel miserable when the gods have to deal with you.

86. I bet your death will be my fault.

87. Die when I'm not around so I don't have to deal with the paperwork.

88. Don't doubt my power, that wyvern knew I wasn't at the school when it attacked.

89. I'm very good at playing the piano...shut up.

90. I'd tell you not to eat that, but I want to see if you choke.

91. You earned your money fair and square and look at what you got now...

92. If you love me, there is something seriously wrong with you.

93. You should see a doctor...oh wait.

94. I fully cover myself because I don't want to catch your stupid.

95. I got a total of 100 quotes, yes three whole digits, can you say 'digits?'

96. How fire resistant are you to withstand all of the burns you take?

97. You aren't startled by LOUD NOISES ARE YOU?

98. You're real close to getting your wish, but you're never gonna get it.

99. Go on...keep pulling the cord.

100. *The doll taps its mask twice and shrugs* I don't have a warranty. *The doll explodes into confetti with a sad trumpet horn sound.*
[Image: g5VjMYf.png]
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#3
Hilarious, however a single typo defaces this, specifically: ' You aren't startled by LOUD NOISES ARE YOU? ' in 97
Please don't lynch me, I'm too young!
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