[SolAndLuna]

Behold, my unfunny additions:

Base Classes:

Archer - Never Enough Range™
Curate - Stop! You violated the law!
Duelist - Sidecut Eviter Fleur Eclair Lacroix
Mage - Has 5 elements, uses one
Martial Artist - Rider Kick!
Rogue - Can have 40 skills
Soldier - 8 attacks, uses maybe 4
Summoner - Party in My Pocket

Promos:
Arbalest - You like Fire Emblem's Generals?
Magic Gunner - Oops! All Basics
Ranger - Flippy! Magical! Does anything! Trees!

Lantern Bearer - Range eternal, dies to Boxers.
Priest - Hope you packed light resist

Ghost - Is technically™ an axe class
Kensei - Blade Barrier? What's that do?
Firebird - Allegedly fights in the air

Evoker - "See where this is going?"
Hexer - All of the statuses!
Rune Magician - Can inflict even more statuses!

Monk - "Now! Barrier!"
Verglas - "Ice resist? That's quaint."
Boxer - Considers any object "ropes" occasionally

Engineer - Summoner without the grind
Void Assassin - Hell of a can opener
Spellthief - Mostly safe, except in Karaten

Black Knight - Void mage, but not dying
Tactician - Stole ranking from Demon Hunters
Demon Hunter - Kinu thinks they're cute, maybe

Grand Summoner - Do you have enough youkai?
Bonder - No damage reduction? Think again!
Shapeshifter - Most of them don't shapeshift